So it's been a little hectic around here the last few weeks. And I will go ahead and say that, "a little hectic," is definitely understated. Sparing the details (because in the grand scheme of life, who wants to remember the details? I could plug in a plethora of scenarios that would qualify as contributing to a hectic season), I've felt slightly like life was spiraling out of control.
Not just out of control for me, out of control for everyone. And that is scary. I've had a few meltdowns in the course of the last couple of days. And tonight God brought me back to clarity.
I weeded my garden.
I remembered my grandpa's phrase over and over, "Weeds in the garden, weeds in your heart." First, it made me tear up because I miss him. Next, I thought about what that phrase meant (because quite frankly most of those Idaho phrases go right over my head). I've been teetering on the edge of an undisciplined life as of late. I've been spending much too much time wondering what life would be like, "if only..." Weeds in my heart. Thank you, Lord, for the very plain reminder that weeds can grow just about anywhere. As I was digging hard at those stubborn weeds (almost jungle-like, I tell you) in my garden area I was surprised to find that my heart has begun to get weeds. And those weeds have started making it hard to remember WHO is in control and WHO has promised good to me. Weeds? Chucked. (I thought it was funny.)
And just as I was having that breakthrough I heard our neighbor, probably close to 50 years old, severely autistic, reciting a radio program he has heard somewhere in the course of his life. Mark (neighbor) works at the small grocery store here as a stocker and a sweeper, and pretty much anything else he can do there. He goes to work every day for a few hours and then comes home to either walk or ride his bike back and forth down our street. Mark is not pursuing promotions, a bigger, better house, life, fill in the blank, that would make him "more content." Mark seems happy. He did tonight. And it reminded me about the verse, "Look at the ravens. They don't need to plant or harvest or put food in barns because God feeds them. And you are far more valuable to him than any birds! Can all your worries add a single moment to your life? Of course not! And, if worry can't do little things like that, what's the use of worrying over bigger things?" (Luke 12:24-26)
The kick in the pants worked, Lord. As usual. Thank you for valuing me more than the ravens (or the pigeons that pooped all over my back deck today). Thank you for caring enough for me to bring to mind a phrase I often heard from my dear Grandpa, but never understood until tonight. I'm going to go do some more weeding...not in my garden.
And, for good measure:
(Bryant's yelling, "NO!!!" at the camera as I snapped this picture. I love you, Dude.)
The Lord has promised good to me, His Word my hope secured. He ever will my portion be, as long as life endures.
