A Little Catching Up

Yesterday was the first day in a really long time where I sat and felt like I could breathe. I mean, I'm talking in the last year and a half this was the first, "Wow, life may just be balancing out into the 'normal' range soon!" Naturally that means today has been hectic and harried for no reason other than Mama's tired, Stuart's 'potty-training' which means he refuses to wear diapers but also forgets to use the toilet. Often. Bryant and Aubs are doing schoolwork and arguing over ev.ery.thing. And every single time Emmett gets laid down he poops. Which wakes him up and not in a "I'll go right back to sleep," kind of way.

But I had yesterday. And I always have laughable and sometimes hysterically funny moments in the hectic.

That's what I want to catch up on. Because this is my life. And someday when I am beyond this stage and my children are in this stage I will be able to look back and remember that they didn't sit quietly and color just on the paper. That they didn't, in fact, potty-train themselves, but rather left piles on the top of the stairs and casually walked through them while I was changing the baby's diaper. That in the middle of the night it had become habit to have 3 boys in bed with us and that more frequently than I'd like to admit I woke up with a kink in my neck in one of the kids' beds because I just needed a place to sleep in the night. But I also hope to remember the many moments that completely trump the crayons on the walls, the sleeplessness, and the poop.

Like Emmett making his "squishy face," as we call it. Completely scrunching his nose up with his eyes shut in a big, toothless smile any time you look at him.
His pleasure and delight in seeing that he can hand toys from one hand to the other.
His giggles at his sister and brothers' antics.

Like Stuart snuggling up to us and saying, "How bout we read books, Mommy?"
Or having a conversation with John that goes something like this: "I pick up the puzzle, Dad!" "Okay, Bud, do you need any help?" "No, Dad, I got it!" a few minutes later: "Did you get it, Stuart?" "I'm gettin' it, Dad!" with the grunts and groans of a 2 year old working hard. And he completed his task!

Or Stuart yelling: "Howard! Howard!" "Stuart, who is Howard?" "I am!" *jumps off the couch to rescue someone*

Like Bryant choosing to do the hard task of controlling himself and encouraging others to do the same. At all of 4 years old. Being able to see his mind working hard to convince his body to do what Jesus wants him to do in obeying us.

Or the pinnacle of the year when we had these conversations in the course of a few weeks.
"Mommy, will we see (fill-in-the-blank) in Heaven?"
"If they knew that Jesus is God and asked Him into their hearts to be their Lord, yes!"
"I believe Jesus is God."
"Have you asked Him to be your Lord and come into your heart?"
"Not yet. I'll do that some other time."
At bedtime lying with him in his bed, a couple weeks later: "Buds, have you asked Jesus into your heart yet?"
"No, I don't know how."
"Would you like to? I'll tell you how."
Nods head.
"I will pray and you can repeat what I say."
And he did. And the angels rejoiced.

Like Aubrey embracing her roll as a big sister, but more importantly as a nurturer and care-giver. Because it's not about her being a big sister, it's about her growing in stature as a young lady who loves and cares for others, because Jesus first loved her.

And seeing her personality continue to blossom; getting to know her as the dainty, precise, lovely, full-of-imagination and not competition girl that she has always been. Being asked, "What is your favorite thing about soccer?" her reply is, "Cheering for everyone else. And when we take breaks."

I saw that in action when we went to the "World Cup Games," of the camp the last day. Her team was in the final and that made this competitive mama very excited. And that embarrassed me. Why do I care when my daughter doesn't? As I'm on the sideline cheering, "Yeah! Jason, good pass! Get it in the goal! Go, go, go, Harry!" I glance over at my sweet girl who has the Senegal flag (her country in the games) draped around her shoulders singing a song and dancing around in some magical world of imagination. And then I immediately remembered the girl on my team in softball who, when given the choice between chasing down a ball and throwing it in to get an out and picking up her hat and placing it perfectly on her head she chose the hat. And I repented of my bad attitude way back in the 3rd grade. And then Aubrey won a medal for being on the winning team. Of course she was excited because it was shiny.

 Sigh. I am blessed. And tired. Tired and blessed. And I have a feeling I will feel this way for the rest of my life.

35 Years

Dear Mom & Dad,

Today is the day you celebrate 35 years of marriage. Okay, so you don't need me to remind you of that. But since I'm terrible at sending mail, consider this your anniversary card.

There are so many reasons I am thankful for you both and the fact that you have chosen to do the hard work of loving each other day in and day out. For 35 years. That's a lot of days, by the way.

You have always modeled friendship in marriage better than any other relationship I've witnessed. Both of you just plain like being with the other and that meant a lot of laughter and a lot of memories of security and safety in our home growing up.

You have held onto each other in the hard times; there have been a few hard times. Saying goodbye to a baby you will meet on the other side of Heaven, illness, deferment of a dream or two, caring for elderly parents and eventually walking with them right up to the gate of Eternity. Those are the biggest ones, I think.

You have modeled faithfulness in loving, ministering, and in many respects laying your life down for those who are closest to you. Because they need to know Jesus as much as people overseas do. You have lived consistently and that makes a bigger statement than handing out tracts.

 

You have embraced us in every season we have been in; helping us through the different phases and stages kids put their parents through. Never giving up, never hiding, never shying away from knowing us, so that we could know you. And in that we could know our Savior.

 

You have embraced the ones we chose to walk with through the adult phase of our journeys. Not just in words but in the laying down of your hobbies, your time, to get to know our spouses. The very same way you got to know us when we were growing up.

 

You have embraced the bunch of little ones who have joined the ranks. Again, not just in words but through your life. You are invested in knowing each new baby that comes into our family in tangible ways. The sensitive, caring, generous, strong-willed, bold, daring, cautious, funny, thinking, rescue-heroing, impish, tender, giggly, gentle personalities of your grandchildren. Out of 9, no two are the same!

 

And they all, every one, adore their Papa and Nana. Because you first loved them.

This is your legacy. It's just beginning.

 

Thank you for saying, 'I do,' 35 years ago. And for following through with your vows. And for living your lives, together, with the purpose of honoring Christ in how you care for those who step through your doors, and into your lives.

 

I love you. Happy 35th anniversary.